I remembered as a child I would occasionally have these strange energies running through my chest, like lines of electricity. I had no idea what it was that I experienced and in the end I developed fear to hide away in fear when these energies would appear.

I forgot about the energies and hiding in fear became normal. In time I forgot about/suppressed the fear and the only thing left was my body showing me by tightening my nose making the breath difficult that something was the matter.

So I'm watching in the moment that I feel these energies occurring, I stop myself from going into fear and quickly suppressing that. Breathing. I wonder how this will develop.

these points opened up:

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to act from the starting point of the electrical currents I feel in my chest, instead of from self as self direction.
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to initiate action to try and get away from the feeling of the electrical currents
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to feel excited by the electrical currents
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to enjoy this excitement
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to end up in stress/anxiety, following the electrical energy.
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to burst out in anger/hatred from this electrical feeling
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to feel superpower from this electrical energy
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to harm my physical body through my actions from the currents
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to leave the centre of myself in my chest to exist in and as a artificial state of energy
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to become irritated when my artificial existence is challenged, when I feel it has no solid foundation in and as myself
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to use reasoning to support it
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to use anger to try and defend it
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to try and end it by endless crying
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to try and forget about it by entertaining myself
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to try and make it real by believing it was God's reality/a higher state of being, believing it to be more important than the physical realm.